God: A sadist
Today i read in the newspaper..."Death Toll of Boy Scouts struck by lightening reaches 16". Yes...u read correctly Boy Scouts!!! What sort of all loving God strikes down boy scouts...yes, these cute little boys (micheal jackson moment there) who help elderly ladies cross the street, learn how to make knots and stuff are facing the wrath of God. Not the terrorists who have killed thousands of ppl...not the retards of the world (Good old Dubya) but Boy Scouts.
God is on a mission to eliminate all the Boy Scouts in the world. As is stated in verse 421 in Gospel of St. Whathisname: "If thou shall help an old fair maiden, by thine hand will thee by struck down yee, and thou shall face the wrath of thy MERCIFUL God"...or something to that effect.
I am sure this is one of the signs of the apocalypse. If my memory serves me well the signs were as follows:
1) Even though there will be a war waging, people starving, countries flooding the top headline in the newspaper will read "Panda gives birth"
2) The stupidest man in the world with also be the most powerful man.
3) Blowing yourself up will be the cool thing to do.
4) Micheal jackson is proven not to be pedophile.
5) Boy Scouts shall be struck down by the hand of God.
I can't make this stuff up...no man can be this creative (or can he). In the end i would have a few words of advice for the youngsters reading this. The next time you see an old lady trying to cross the road...push her infront of the oncoming traffic. You dont want to incur the wrath of God...look what happened to lil Timmy for helping the old lady...and dont forget what happened to slow Al when he made the perfect knot. So to insure ur safety young'ns don't be a boy scout, start hussling some crystal meth, crack, cocaine and then maybe just maybe God will have some mercy on your soul.
God is on a mission to eliminate all the Boy Scouts in the world. As is stated in verse 421 in Gospel of St. Whathisname: "If thou shall help an old fair maiden, by thine hand will thee by struck down yee, and thou shall face the wrath of thy MERCIFUL God"...or something to that effect.
I am sure this is one of the signs of the apocalypse. If my memory serves me well the signs were as follows:
1) Even though there will be a war waging, people starving, countries flooding the top headline in the newspaper will read "Panda gives birth"
2) The stupidest man in the world with also be the most powerful man.
3) Blowing yourself up will be the cool thing to do.
4) Micheal jackson is proven not to be pedophile.
5) Boy Scouts shall be struck down by the hand of God.
I can't make this stuff up...no man can be this creative (or can he). In the end i would have a few words of advice for the youngsters reading this. The next time you see an old lady trying to cross the road...push her infront of the oncoming traffic. You dont want to incur the wrath of God...look what happened to lil Timmy for helping the old lady...and dont forget what happened to slow Al when he made the perfect knot. So to insure ur safety young'ns don't be a boy scout, start hussling some crystal meth, crack, cocaine and then maybe just maybe God will have some mercy on your soul.
posted by Late night with Dani at 7:00 AM
1 Comments:
"The next time you see an old lady trying to cross the road...push her infront of the oncoming traffic."
You are bad influence. I am under 18. *hyuk hyuk hyuk*
H-I-L-A-R-I-O-U-S though :D
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